Each week I bring you the top stories in the auto industry along with my commentary or sometimes amusing thoughts about the craziness that goes on in the world of cars.
Waymo Solves Self-Driving, Still Needs a Doorman. Waymo’s robotaxis are very advanced, very expensive, and very capable of doing almost everything — except making sure the door is closed. In Los Angeles, the self-driving car company has been quietly paying humans $20 to $24 per call to physically shut robotaxi doors after riders wander off without closing them. When a door is left ajar, the vehicle shuts down like a confused Roomba and refuses to move, triggering a help request sent through a roadside-assistance app. A gig worker shows up, closes the door, and voilà — the future of transportation continues. Waymo says the issue isn’t common, but it’s common enough that tow operators report multiple calls a week, often for something that takes less time than reading this sentence. Some contractors say the pay barely covers the hassle of finding the car, which is ironic given that the car supposedly knows exactly where it is. The company insists future vehicles will have automatic doors, which suggests engineers have just now discovered hinges. Until then, the world’s most sophisticated autonomous vehicles remain dependent on old-fashioned human hands to complete the driving process. It’s a reminder that while the industry loves to promise a driverless future, it still hasn’t figured out how to make people close the door behind them — a problem humans solved sometime around the invention of the house.
156 mph, No Lights, No Common Sense. Some people ring in the New Year with champagne, others with fireworks, and one Washington State driver apparently chose 156 miles per hour with the headlights off, because subtlety is overrated. State troopers say the car blasted past them on Interstate 5 in heavy fog just before midnight, moving so fast it basically teleported into the distance before anyone could react. To review: it was dark, wet, foggy, and this genius decided the best move was to more than double the speed limit while pretending headlights are optional equipment. Unsurprisingly, police never caught up, which means the driver either achieved a clean getaway or is still out there believing they unlocked a secret highway achievement badge. It’s a reminder that while cars keep getting faster and safer, common sense remains stubbornly unavailable as standard equipment, even at the start of a brand-new year.
Fresh Smell, Funky Laws: Air Fresheners Can Get You a Ticket. If you like cruising down the highway with a fuzzy pine tree swinging from your rearview, you might want to check the local statutes, because in several U.S. states it’s technically illegal to let anything dangle from your mirror — yes, even if it smells like “New Car Scent” — on the grounds that it can obstruct your view and therefore your ability to avoid hitting something more expensive than a Scentsy. Lawmakers apparently decided that something as innocuous as an air freshener could be a legitimate line of sight hazard, putting it in the same “don’t hang it here” category as fuzzy dice, protest signs, and unapproved Bluetooth gurus. This means that while you’re out there trying to mask the lingering “fast food tray meets gym bag” aroma, you’re also one careless turn away from a ticket for automotive aromatherapy. In other words, freshening the air might now cost you more than the car wax you bought to impress strangers at the stoplight.
Tesla Innovates, Trademark Office Waits. Tesla apparently waited a little too long to lock down the trademark on “Cybercab,” leaving a startup named Wild’s Cab — which makes electric pedicabs meant for cities and campuses — to grab it first and put Tesla in the awkward position of either buying the rights or watching yet another name it probably thought it owned slip through its digital fingers. The result is a reminder that even the company that puts “cyber” on every other product still has to play by the same paperwork rules as everyone else, and that in the scramble to name futuristic trucks and robot axis boxes something as simple as protecting your branding early can save you from a headache later. In the grand Tesla tradition of innovating at breakneck speed, it seems trademark offices sometimes move faster than product teams, and now the Cybercab name belongs to someone else while Tesla either negotiates or goes back to the drawing board. It’s a small twist in the EV era that feels like a gentle poke at a company that often acts like it already owns tomorrow.